If you hang around here, you probably have noticed that this blog has been comatose for several weeks.
What happened was, I got promoted at work and then I went to Wittenberg for Homecoming weekend and trudged through the freezing rain just to get to the bar, drank keg beer while surrounded by basketball players fist pumping to Good Charlotte, executed a three-way Mad Dog race, broke glass bottles on the concrete wall of the basement of that one fraternity house, smoked an entire pack of cigarettes in the span of 24 hours, ate half a bag of TGIFriday’s Potato Skin chips at 3:00 in the morning while seriously wondering if it would be my last meal before I froze to death, and passed out in an RV two nights in a row, and when I finally resurfaced to reality several days later I realized that I had forgotten to pay my rent for October and I felt like I had just recovered from the flu and suddenly I had no interest in taking time out of my day to blog anymore.
Part of it was because I was tired, and part of it was because I was busy and preoccupied with work, but the other part was that I was just sort of over how trite this blog has become. In Springfield I spent time with some of my closest friends from Wittenberg, friends who inspire me because they are funny, intelligent, interesting, and crazy, and when I imagined myself mentioning my blog to them, I felt very silly and embarrassed. What would they think if I tried to talk to them about my little corner of the internet where I post crappy recipes and terribly edited pictures I take and links to crafts I’ll never do? I’m not proud enough of this blog to intentionally bring it up to any of my friends out there in the real world, and that has begun to bother me.
Even beyond that, I feel like I had fallen into a routine of spending way too much time staring into the abyss of my laptop screen instead of going out and enjoying the company of my friends and actually, you know, having experiences that might be worth blogging about. And it’s not that I don’t like what this blog has turned into, but I was just starting to feel very confined by the space I’ve created for myself. I started this blog because I wanted a place to write, specifically a place where I could write uninhibited, visceral shit about my life and my experiences without ever worrying about what people would think of it. But then I got caught up with the blogging cliches, and I let myself start to feel guilty if I didn’t post often enough, and ultimately I just feel like I’ve drifted away from what I really wanted to get out of this blog.
The other thing is that I’m tired of using free WordPress as a host. It is an awesome platform for people who don’t have any interest in monetizing their blogs or posting edgy, racy content. But I’m bothered by the fact that I can’t link to articles on Sexis magazine because the content is deemed pornographic or some shit, and I’m bothered by the fact that I can’t use ads to make a few pennies for myself. I want to be a brand whore! Mainly, I want to actually use my Amazon Associates account, and be able to do giveaways on my blog if a company offers me money or free stuff. I also want to be done with “lynseysmith.wordpress.com” because I don’t like the idea of my full name being so central to the place on the internet where I hope to write more visceral, racy shit in the future.
For now this blog will stay pretty quiet until I can get motivated enough to make the logistic changes that need to happen before I’ll feel comfortable committing to a blog again. I’ve thought about leaving it behind and starting over completely fresh, but moving on has always been very difficult for me, and I’m not ready to forego all the content on this blog quite yet. I’ve been thinking about moving all my existing content to a new host — ideally I would like to copy everything over to Blogger because it’s still free, but I haven’t been able to figure out how to do that without it being extremely manual and tedious and time consuming. If anyone has any advice, I’d appreciate it.
I hope you’ll still check back here, because I promise that Dressed to Chill will be back sometime in the not-too-far future. And until then, thanks to everyone who has supported me and this blog, with a special thanks to the people over at Get Off My Internets, who have taken a liking to mine and Erin’s mock outfit post and have recently generated a lot of traffic to my blog even though I haven’t added any new content for a month.
I love you, internet. I’ll be back.